i put my faith in you, so much faith, and then you just threw it away

i love finding parallels in our writings, it shows that (in)sane minds think alike.

the show is tomorrow, 8 months of hard work for 2 minutes on a stage in a venue filled with one of my best friends and a lot of people that i don't know. my favorite girls are coming to the night show, they're going to yell things and embarrass me, and that's why i love them. i live to please the crowd, make everyone happy, that's my role. i may not be the best, but i'm certainly the most charismatic (but where is my broadway role for the biggest fraud?). live to dance, dance to live, its not a fashionstatement, its a lifestyle. and save your compliments- "you were wonderful" no i'm not, "you're such a great dancer" no i'm not, there are girls that are younger, prettier, skinnier, and far more talented than me. i want to make it big, but i have no faith in myself to do so.

fuck, i just realized that i need to finish that solo to "golden" by next week.

its a love-hate relationship. sometimes i can hang out with you for a week in a row, and other times i want to strangle you. its a onetwoknockout relationship, when is it going to end?

i am so ashamed to live here after going to work tonight.