so i went to my jazz teachers wedding today. she looked beautiful, and she was so happy. i want to be happy, to find the one. v2 was there because he's my tap teacher, so we were chilling with him. he looked so cute, and i just got all sad because i want him sooooo badly, i have this sick infatuation with him, and i know i'll never get him because i'm fat and i'm not supposed to be happy, my life is supposed to suck.
i'm talking to k, who i really want to fall off a cliff and die. i'm giving her advice about guys, when i'm the one that has zero experience with them.
i want to be numb, for all of this pain to go away. just drink it all away until i'm fucking trashed, or cut it all away until i'm passed out from the loss of blood.
98lbs by December 29th.
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