don't you weep

i'm so fucking sick. one of the little monsters at camp gave me the cold from hell. i've been coughing non-stop all day, it sucks.

i <3 bright eyes- one of their songs is a favorite of every girl with an eating disorder- "you're looking skinny like a model with your eyes all painted black, going to the bathroom always saying you'll be right back" (i don't think i got that right).

gained horribly last week, 3.8lbs. fasted from 1am-6:15pm, it would've been from 6:30pm, but i had to eat a spring roll whilst watching t-minus rock. then i saw flyleaf's new video and how gorgeous lacey is, and i put back the onion rings (why the fuck was i planning on eating those?!) i was going to eat and contemplated purging, but that wouldn't have been too good because i had just taken my medicine and i didn't want to purge it up. and the fast was supposed to be from sunday night until tonight, but then my mom made dinner on last night and i had to eat a little bit. fasting maybe from tomorrow afternoon after lunch at camp (i have to eat because then the kids will be like "why aren't you eating" because we make them eat their lunches) until thursday?

i was fasting so i would look good for the underage scene boys at the cute is what we aim for concert that was tonight, but i wound up not being able to go because none of my friends could go with me. but we may be traveling to the shithole that is jersey on the 23rd to see them, so i'll probably be doing a 2-3 day fast then. i then start classes on the 30th, i have to purchase my text books.

camp and then the jonas brothers concert tomorrow at the theater that i work at, i can't wait, its gonna be awesome. i wonder if i'm ushering or being the super-awesome merch girl that i sometimes am. i hope that we get to meet them, the one that's my age is hot. but the opening band is a wannabe spice girls, so myself and my fellow ushers/dance homies shall be yelling insults to them, lol.

my uncle has a myspace, he's 43. he sent me a message telling me to get off of there because there are creeps on there. um there's creeps and weird (not in a good way) guys everywhere. i ignore all of the weird messages i get, i only met a guy from myspace once and he was fucking strange, and when i had a guy that wouldn't leave me alone, i blocked him. i'm smart with mine, i don't add anyone over 21 unless they're really cool/taken/or i know them. a good portion of my list are my cerulean butterflies, boarders, cheerleaders (i was one in high school), college buds, and dance homies. the rest are bands and really hot guys. ok, i'm done.